Wednesday, 28 October 2015

30DWC - a book you love and one you didn't

Day 8: A book you love and one you didn't

A book. A book. I adore books! I love them! I read them and then pop them on the shelf for a while thinking I'll probably read them again...but mostly I don't get back to them. One, however, that has warranted a second reading is Change Your Questions Change Your Life by Marilee Adams PhD. It was a bit of a life changer in that it gave me a new approach when things didn't seem to be working out in life. It's given me a new perspective on how to work with myself and with other people. 

The book is based on the premise that we operate out of one of two different modes - Judger or Learner. When we are in Judger mode we tend to do things like apportion blame for things not working right or find fault in ourselves or others. We can be really stuck in a pit of self-pity and asking "Why me?". In Learner mode we will ask questions like "How else can I look at this?" "What can I learn from this situation?" "What assumptions am I making?" and "What is the other person thinking, feeling, wanting?" I have found that if I am feeling down, grumpy, lacking energy, that I am likely to be in Judger mode. Once I am aware I can switch my thinking and find new answers that change my position and get me moving again. It's pretty cool. Judger is not bad. Judger is useful in lots of different ways but can also trap us if we're not careful. Learner sets us free. That's how it feels to me anyway. So yes, this book has a permanent place on my bookshelf as the title itself serves as a reminder to be aware of the mode I'm in.

Trying to think of a book I didn't like. I'm not really one of those people that will persevere with a book until the bitter end. If I'm not enjoying it or at the very least getting some new knowledge from it then I ditch it and move on. So I guess I'm trying to think of one I started and didn't complete. That's hard because they don't really earn a space in my memory bank with that kind of lack lustre performance. That doesn't mean they're not good books. It just means they didn't connect with me at that time in my life. Still, they don't hang around on my bookshelf unless I got something out of them or I really think I'm the one at fault and it's a classic so I might go back and try again later...when I've grown up a bit more! No, alas, none are coming to mind right now. I might come back and add one if I come up with one through the day. 

I'd love to hear about books you've loved or hated. Maybe I'll find a new one to put on my must read list. 

Cheers for now

Kerry x

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